Say Bye Bynes @AmandaBynes

i figured out Amanda Bynes’ fucking problem

There’s a lot i don’t know, for example i don’t know what your problem is, but add this to the short column of shit i do know: i know Amanda Bynes’ problem and, like the cat that we just ran over, it was in front of us all the time.

Check it:

Amanda Bynes is, like what, 38 years old?—and she doesn’t drink. That, Barmaids and Beerhounds, is enough to drive anyone batshit crazy.

Hunter S. Thompson said it best (and got paid a shit lot more than me, too) when he said

I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they’ve always worked for me.

Amanda tweeted her confession soon after the police fished her out of her apartment for a little catch and release, meaning she was arrested and set free in a little offshoot of “cat and mouse” i call “pussy and mousy”, in which Amanda plays both parts.

“Does she drink?”

“Does she drink?” is the wrong question because the right question is “Does it matter?” and i’m so generous i’ll even tell you the answer and the answer is, “No, it does not fucking matter.” It doesn’t fucking matter because whatever Amanda Good-Bynes is doing or not doing is derailing that train wreck.

Exhibit ‘A’ for ‘A’manda before:

Amanda Bynes Before Wallpaper AlKHall Bar None

Amanda Bynes Bar None Wallpaper – Click on the Shot for a Wallpaper

Exhibit ‘B’ for ‘B’ynes after:

One Hot Mess

Pictures puke louder than words…

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And while i’m hanging paper here, i found out Google who hates me and wants the Bar None to close down forever by giving all my patronizers the wrong directions on getting here has credited a phishing site with a wallpaper i stole photos for with my own fingers and made my own self on my own computer and posted here first. i’m putting it up again here as a way to piss on it to mark my territory.

Amanda Bynes drunk at the Bar None wallpaper – Click on the Shot for a Wallpaper

So here’s the bottom line @Amanda Bynes

Amanda Bynes, you seem like a good kid who’s been tossed into the arena with tons of lions and all they gave you to defend yourself was way more money and time than you could handle. Unfortunately, throwing money at the lions doesn’t seem to be working, and the crazy you’re baking is only making them hungrier and scaring away the fans in the stands you already had.

The secret to killing the lions is not to fight them. It’s to turn your back to them, turn off your computer, go far away to someplace safe and close your eyes until those lions are hungry enough that they attack some other poor sweet starlette who’s easier.

i really do wish you the best,

Al K Hall

PS You’re nose is super cute, i wouldn’t change a thing.